Theres a fine line between being constructive and being critical- Just sayin'.

So here is another popular topic! Since I probably won't be doing anything exciting until my NYC trip, maybe I could just rip up more controversial topics har har har. So on youtube one of the things I notice most commonly is what I *hope* is simply misunderstanding between "beauty gurus" (I use this term lightly...I just think its weird IDK) and their subscribers. Lots of harsh, brash words are exchanged throughout the comments section of videos. Basically, at the end of it they both think each others a bitch LOL.

Most of this results from comments that the viewers (and Im going to assume they're just trying to be constructive) say to the youtuber, which sparks the harsh confrontation. I can think of some about myself that are common: my hair flip (sorry its not going away deal with it haha) the rate at which I speak, and most recently, the auto-play of music on my blog LOL.

Who posted the comments (2 people for you nosier folks) is irrelevant but basically it was just said that auto play music is annoying buahaha. I'm not upset or trying to call people out which is why I deleted the comments before posting this: you know if I was i'm the type to do it explicitly, but it was a good opportunity to start on this post which I've been meaning to do for awhile

So coming from my (a youtuber's) perspective:

This is what itches my butt about it: youtube is a service, not only that Youtube is a FREE service. In the case of my blog: its MY blog. Its going to reflect me, and in all honesty id rather make videos because blogspot is a pain in the butt BUT I maintain my blog for two reasons: 1. because I want my viewers to see that i'm not a dim-witted air headed biatch and I can talk about things completely unrelated to makeup/beauty. And two, I can have product information on here that would be difficult to do a video on (like that Shiseido pureness post). That post took me almost 2-3 hours (okay I was watching TV too >.<) to complete, it takes two seconds to turn off the music on someone's blog. It kind of felt like a slap in the face after all that work I put in to it. I really get a LOOTT of questions about the pureness line, and I thought I was going out of my way talking about something I didnt even use anymore (had to go back find prices, names etc) and you cant just turn the music off my blog x.X? I, for one, clearly like the music on my blog :) harhar Its one of the only redeeming qualities to me about blogspot honestly (which btw is annoying as FACK to upload to) I cant include music in my videos due to copyright issues; so that is why I insist on my music here. Even in my myspace and xanga days, I always had music on my page.

I can't stand plenty of peoples music on their blogspots LOL but its their blogspot, so if i want the info on the page they have to offer, turning off some music isn't a huge inconvenience I think. Thats how I feel about everyone's mannerisms, music etc. If I want the information they have to offer, Ill watch their videos, listen to their music, ignore their "ummmss" ...and suck it up. Because im getting that information and entertainment for free, and if its too much to handle, theres always that [x] box at the top of the right hand of any window (it works, and its satisfying, you leave that page darn it! Go you LOL).

Now on the side of the viewer:

Now this kinda deals with the "hater" post but its a little bit different! I know not everyone that posts is trying to attack you, a lot of times they REALLY think their suggestions would improve the quality of your product (be it your videos, blog etc) or they're just trying to make what they think to be a harmless observation [common ones are: you look tired, you look different, your skin looks bad, your eye looks weird etc]. but just because were on youtube, doesn't mean we don't have feelings and don't get insecure, and in the midst of mass replying to comments a lot gets lost in translation. And I know sometimes youtubers are too hasty, youtube as I mentioned has been a huge learning experience for me. I try really hard now to calm down when I see a comment that makes me mad, and try to see it from their perspective and REALLY decide if people we're trying to be insulting or not. Because sometimes, people are really just trying to help. But other times... people are just trying to be an ass (come on! you've SEEN some of the awful things people say right?) but just like how I think people on youtube (including myself!) can be too hasty, I do think sometimes comments could be worded better.

"No offense" first off, is always insulting. No offense you look_____ NEVER softens the blow. So don't say it, because obviously it's offensive.

If you think someone looks better another way, you can say "I really like how you look with straight hair :)" not "your hair looks ugly like this"

If you think someone looks tired, you can say "you look like you haven't been sleeping well, are you okay? :[" which makes it clear that you're NOT attacking them and are making a harmless observation. Some people may consider this ass-kissing. But please keep in mind you probably don't know the people you watch/read, so unless you comment often they don't know and generally don't assume that you're honestly concerned, trying to be helpful or curious. We get attacked ALL the time and the pressure to look good and be perfect is CONSTANTLY on us. It definitely comes with the territory, but we get insecure just like anyone else. We're human, we get zits, we get eye bags, we ramble, we're not perfect.

Im not innocent of having never lashed out unnecessarily, but I have been trying to get better. I've definitely mis-interpreted a few comments in my time, and felt pretty bad when I realized I shocked the innocent person commenting (to you guys, sorry if I didn't say it :[ I do try and apologize when Im in the wrong and generally make amends with people, there shouldn't be any recents though.)

So basically my whole point is, I think we should remember why everyone goes on to youtube in the first place-for the love of beauty. I think its just kinda disheartening to see how negative a place youtube has become. Every youtuber was at one point a viewer too, so we've been in those shoes. But I honestly think both youtubers and viewers alike are at fault. Youtubers should not so quickly think we are being attacked, grow some tougher skin and not dwell on it but people who choose to watch our videos should also put our feelings in to consideration.

"But she'd/you/they'd be nothing without us" And I agree, youtubers are just people (just like celebrities are just people) and are nothing without our viewers, but asking someone to change who they are because you (your one person) doesn't enjoy it, honestly doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. I'm not saying never offer a friendly suggestion, but just keep in mind theres a fine line between being constructive and being critical. And as a favor to me and others, try to word it in a way that there will be no misinterpretation. Even if I were to change said habits that few (read:the minority) of people find annoying, there are much more people that have an odd fascination with the way I flip my hair, hate slow talkers and who routinely download all the songs they hear on here. My point is, I can't win 'em all, so I don't even bother trying. I've said this many times before, theres just no making everyone happy so its much better to be yourself. If someone really bothers me, I don't watch their videos. Thats it. No drama, no confrontation and I can find other people I like just fine. [If you don't like the way someone is and you continue watching their videos and are upset by it, whose the dumb dumb? No ones forcing you to watch.] And if I should be in the unfortunate situation that no one else has the information I want and then force myself to watch said videos- I suck it up, clench my teeth, and imagine how pleasant it'd be to gauge out my eyeballs to the sound of their voice, excessive "umms" and continue watching.

PS. However I do understand that not everyone likes rnb and apologize for placing my media player on default volume and so far down my page. I have now lowered the default volume (which I just found out you can do btw :D ) and moved my media player to the top right of the page so that the "off" switch is now more conveniently located LOL. Enjoy.

Love, Jackie :)

Feel free to discuss, agree...disagree... I just wanted to get that out there and I encourage everyone (myself included) to suck it up

okay? okay! ^________^ V

"I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not."