Monday, March 28, 2011

25 Random Facts About Me :)

I keep seeing people I follow do this tag, and it's funny how much you learn about people through it (even people who you speak to often) so I thought it'd be a fun and easy blog post to do :)

1. I'm INCREDIBLY afraid of the dark, so much so I can't sleep without a light on. I'll stay awake even if it means being awake until the sun rises and then sleeping when there's light. Speaking of sleeping, I have nightmares almost every single night. I usually wake up at least once or twice in my sleep

2. I love animals. Honestly I like them more than people. I'll make excuses for mean animals but not rotten people LOL. They love you no matter what, they don't care about how you look or how you dress, the money you have etc...and even if they don't love you at least they wont pretend like they do :P

3. I am NOTORIOUS for losing everything. Clothes, shoes, sunglasses (especially). Anyone who hangs out with me enough starts looking around every time we leave somewhere because they know I probably left something behind

4. I am half Cantonese, half Mandarin Chinese. Culturally I identify more with my Cantonese half, but I speak mostly Mandarin Chinese (my mom focused on speaking mandarin to me because it is more universal)

5. I never kept my nails painted until youtube (I do it so no one will harp at me haha!).But now I really like and appreciate how it looks :)

6. I have a really bad habit of shaking my foot that I'm trying to stop. I think it's horrendous but I do it whenever I'm idle

7. I have IBS/Spastic Colon. So basically my digestive system doesn't work very well. I'm usually pretty bloated if not in pain -_-

8. I stand at only 5'2 but I'm the tallest person in my family (my dad used to be taller but he shrunk with age, but even then he was only 5'4)

Chinese fan dance...Haha sometime during elementary school

9. I learned all sorts of dance growing up. I took ballet for 14 years, 6 or so years of Chinese folk dancing, and I dabbled a bit in ball room, hip hop and some other courses too.

10. I can sleep for 14 hours+ if you let me ;_; and I'm incredibly grumpy and snappy when I'm tired.

11. I play the gu zheng, otherwise known as the chinese harp. My mom gave me the options of piano or violin and I told her I didn't want either because they're so typical. Eventually we settled on something a bit more unique :P

12. I never went to school with another Asian until high school.

13. I can eat as much as my boyfriend who is a little over 6'1 -_- But I like to believe it's because HE eats too little and not because I eat too much :p

14. I have a crazy work ethic. I refuse to text during work, slack off or not finish a job I know needs to be done, regardless of the time I'm being paid for. If I have to stay and work overtime and off the clock I will. If I ever feel I didn't do something as well as I can it'll nag at me long after

15. My only food addictions in life are: boba (bubble) milk tea, spicy tuna rolls, fresh spring rolls, xia long baos, anything soupy or noodle/pasta dishes and most recently, street tacos :D!!!

16. I don't particularly like hello kitty, but for some reason I feel obligated to purchase hello kitty stuff and to think it's cute. Does that make any sense -_-?

17. I have a really heavy conscience. I just don't understand people who don't respect other people's right to be happy, but I'm a big believer in Karma as well.

18. I never carry around cash because I think it's obnoxious and I tend to spend it more frivolously than the money on my debit card (which makes no sense).

19. I want to learn photoshop so I can alter the hell out of my pictures and make myself a babe 8) (half joking) But I really want to spruce my blog up in general :)

20. I hated tea as a kid but now I loooveee drinking tea :) I think its so relaxing.

21. People hate texting me unless they have iPhones as well because I text like its AIM. -_- So basically I habitually text in many short bursts

22. I'm incredibly paranoid. I think this is something thats kind of come out of my life experiences. I used to trust everyone and now I don't trust anyone.

23. I haven't had short hair since 10th grade. It was the result of a bad hair cut-she chopped off all my hair when I only asked for a trim. She asked me how I liked it and I cried because prom was the next week x.x

24. I really hate my youtube screen name. I made it a long time ago and never thought it'd be something that would remain affiliated with me since I never thought i'd upload my own videos. I might as well have made it xXmszjackiechuXx or something even more asian ^___^V
blegh. Haha

25. I have one older sister and two (much older) half sisters.

And thats it! Wow that's a text heavy blog...I know everyone always warns about picture heavy posts (and this may be juvenile of me) but I like pictures :D So here, another! From the ballet days :) Check out the wicked one piece tan line and how buff the legs used to be x.x

Take care ^^ Next posts will be about NY<3

xo, Jackie

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Oh. Do I even need to introduce this one? Since this youtube video went viral I've had countless subscribers send me links, parodies, news articles etc. But let me just say this: I think this incident has gone way out of control.

Now let me make it clear that I am NOT defending her. It's clear to me that she's narrow-minded, self-entitled, a bigot and foolish. I'm not saying what she did wasn't stupid. The truth is this girl just ruined her life with a 3 minute webcam rant gone viral. Sounds dramatic right? But new stories are being posted on this by the minute, and not just by some bored kids during finals week. LA Times, New York Daily, and even the chancellor of UCLA himself has commented on this incident. Her name has even started to be a trending topic on twitter. How will she ever show her face again on campus with a student population that is over 40% asian?

Let me first explain what bothers me about the video:
- "These hoards of asian people that UCLA accepts in to our school every year". She refers to UCLA as "our school", does this mean that if you are a student and you are not white then it is not your school?

-Mocking asian family ties. ESPECIALLY the part where she complains about the whole family coming over from to you. Practically everyone immigrated here. America isn't "yours" either.

-The whole ching chong ling long ting tong junk. Note to self: Write that on tomorrow's final and see if my teacher will accept it as integration of new outside vocabulary LOL

-The complete insensitivity to those affected by the tsunami.

But in all honesty I'm kind of shocked (and disappointed) by the asian community's reaction to this video. I've seen death threats, her address posted, email, contact information everything. Calling her a "bitch" "slut" "whore", and multiple posts encouraging people to contact UCLA school officials to have her expelled...come on now. Seriously?

This epitomizes what I hate MOST about the asian community. One of my friends mentioned he was glad this video happened and that it, "bonded and united the asian community". These are not the kind of issues we should be bonding over. I feel like one of our shortcomings as a community is we pick and pick and pick at people until there is just nothing left. We actively participate and revel in watching people fall, and lack empathy towards those we do not identify with. THIS video should not have been re-tweeted hundreds of times in an hour when I feel no videos regarding Tsunami fundraising where given such attention or passion. The way I see it getting this girl kicked out of school is not going to change her feelings of entitlement or thoughts toward asian culture. It won't erase the bigotry that has been deeply engrained there for many years. She obviously opened up a can of worms with this one, and I promise you guys she is already deeply paying for her lapse of judgement. Regardless of the school's actions, I really don't think she can continue to soundly go to school there (unless she changes her name and gets a great dye job). I'm also pretty sure that at the very least she won't be completing her finals this quarter. I'm sure she's paid enough and will continue to pay in the days and weeks to come.

So yes, she was dumb. We all know this. She should have just moved higher up in the library to the quieter floors (every library at the UCs are like this, the higher up you go the more studious and quiet the people). It would have taken much less time than making, editing and uploading a video to youtube. But the truth of the matter is nothing she said in the video shocked me and It's nothing I haven't heard multiple times growing up. I've been "ching chonged" at more times than I can count. Unfortunately there's a million people out there just like her, and there's better and more admirable things that the Asian community can bond over rather than the video of some silly girl.

So ching chong away fellow Asians hahahahaa!!
And if you become exasperated this finals season, try not to upload a racist tirade on to youtube.

love, Jackie

"an eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind"
...and doesn't make her or the world any less racist.

PS. I'd also like to note that people kill themselves all the time over cyber-bullying. It's happened many many times before, and your specific IP address is recorded every time you write on the internet (even when you post somewhere anonymously) and all it takes is a court issued subpoena to release your information to authorities. So be smart about the things you do and say online, as Ms. Wallace has learned the online world is the new reality.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Yet another random and sporadic blog post.
Why? Because I made some particularly potent hot royal milk tea (I've been trying to perfect the recipe >.<) and I can't sleep. Although I really should.

So after going to the gym and letting my hair down I thought BLEGH. I mean I had worked out a lot but still...inexcusable. Was in much need of a deep conditioning treatment -_-

After :D Perffeeccttion. Excuse my vanity but I thought the mane looked particularly awesome in this picture and look! it works :) The second pic is of my hair non-straightened, it lays flat much better when its moisturized ^^ So now you guys know that the Hask n Placenta Hair mask with olive oil works and i'm not trying to get a kick of you using unspoken body parts on your hair.

Next I'm sad about finals but I started studying a week ago so I'm pretty confident in all of mine :) I'm so excited to go to New York. You guys have no idea...its pretty much all i've been thinking about. That and all the DELICIOUS food I will be religiously blogging ^^ Zee boyfriend has to go to work Wed-Fri when I'm there so I'll have my daylight hours to make videos and blog for you guys :D Also I should have a imju fiberwig mascara review up soon. I LOVE THIS MASCARA AHH! :D But it's been kind of hard for me to figure out a good side shot so that's whats been keeping me. But it's really does give you a falsie-like effect :) Perfect if you're like me who loves the look of falsies but would feel uncomfortable with the thought of wearing them everyday.

Also I thought I'd share with you guys some stories since I've been studying so much already know what. CHINESE. Joy. My entire life now centers around your class Liu Laoshi. Haha but in all honestly I actually loved her as a teacher and am quite sad she won't be teaching the second half of the class :[ But every day in class I sit next to the same guy and we we're exchanging stories about how we were both reluctant to learn chinese when we were young....obviously my stubbornness was more outrageous. I've always been VERY stubborn (and spiteful!) . Thankfully I'm not quite like this any longer though so *deep breath* story time okay?

So there are two incidents that I recall clearly growing up. The first was my father telling my mom that no one was to speak or interact with me unless I spoke chinese. This meant no eating (being fed), no being spoken to, no going out, nothing. So yup, I starved myself for four days with no food. As a child I wasn't really fond of eating mom took me to the doctor when I was in 2nd grade because I'd only eat a tablespoon of rice and she was worried I had an eating disorder. Now she knows this lack of interest in food is because I've always hated rice because its terribly bland LOL. Even to this day I only have rice when I'm eating sushi...and that's about it. But between starve or learn chinese. I chose starve. Obviously this method of encouragement failed and life resumed as normal sans chinese.

Second...I was still in second grade so this was about the same time as story number one. My parents were about to go out to dinner and my dad gave me the option of "study for your chinese test or get out the house". So you can guess what I did...I started packing. Hahaha I spent the whole 4 hours of their absence packing all my adolescent things and bringing them downstairs. By the time my parents got home my mom came in to the living room to see me staring at a tower of boxes 5 boxes high...and me sitting there with a puzzled look on my face trying to figure out how the hell I was going to get it all on my little red wagon and out the door. She asked me what I was doing with the boxes and I explained that my options were study or get I chose get out. She kind of just rolled her eyes at this and sat down with me to study -_- haha

Moral of this story: Even if your dad is a huge jerk off, learn the language anyway so you don't have to spend excessive hours in college catching up. Well okay thats not the real moral of this post...the true moral is don't make overly strong tea at 3 am and expect to sleep or make comprehensible blog posts

Night world :)

PS. Needless to say you have all heard of the catastrophe going on in Japan. I just donated $10 to the redcross via text by texting the word "REDCROSS" to 90999. The 10 dollars will be added to your next phone bill :) Come on costs as much as a dinner out with friends. Just stay home, cook for yourself and do something good for someone else. If you can afford $40 foundations and $50.00 Chanel blushes, you can spare 10 dollars to help people who really need it.

Also please note there are many fundraising blogtvs going on right now :) You can support relief efforts just by dropping by! Bubzbeauty is hosting one RIGHT NOW...but will only be on for a few hours longer. So if you're awake within three hours of this blog's posting please drop by- believe it or not your view counts ^^ Thank you guys

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Rest in Paradise Bice. I miss you, we all will
The world is truly worse off without you here

Sunday, March 06, 2011

So where have you been D:?!

Sorry guys, I've just been so horrendously busy. I just have a really bad school schedule this quarter with awful gaps so i'm on campus literally until 630 many nights and start as early as 7 on others -_- . In addition to that I'm taking a chinese class and let me tell you right now that my chinese leaves much to be desired LOL. But I'm in an accelerated course thats designed for people who can at least understand chinese, so many of my peers are people who were born in Taiwan and moved here when they were young. Thats honestly where most of my time has gone to... I spend a few hours on chinese every single day. I HAVE to or otherwise I'd probably fail because even the kids who are much more fluent than I need to study constantly. On top of that we have pages and pages of homework everyday...if you follow me on twitter then you know I always harp about it -_-

Six pages that day -_- it gets a lot worse than this though we've had up to nine pages in one least most of this was just copying words and not writing pages of sentences.

That being said, I also study really hard for it because this is one of my only chances I have left to learn it. Sure I can learn in the future, but this will probably be the last time I can learn Chinese in a classroom setting. It's actually become really important for me to better my Chinese. When I was younger I refused to speak it so I'm left with a pretty poor grasp of it now. I think why I resented learning Chinese so much was because I associated it with everything I hated about myself growing up. For one my father tried forcing me to speak it and I never had a good relationship with my father. In fact, if you asked him my name or age right now he'd probably not be able to answer correctly within 4-5 tries. He could tell you that I play the chinese harp, can perform traditional chinese dances and did ballet for years but he wouldn't be able to tell you one personal thing about myself. My parents aren't divorced, but they're certainly not close or affectionate in the way american families are. My parents have never even said I love you to each other. My relationship with my father is pretty long and dark but I first and foremostly refused to speak chinese because I knew he wanted me to (and I'm an incredibly spiteful person). Secondly I just hated being asian in general. I've always been honest about this...about how I grew up blaming my ethnicity for the problems I had fitting in. Kids would pull their eyes, imitate chinese to me etc, so I never liked being chinese until well in to high school.

Many years later I find myself envying the kids who can competently read and write in their native language. My mother can speak Cantonese, Mandarin, Toisan and English fluently and also knows some wasn't until the age I am now that I realized how incredibly helpful and amazing that is. I seethe with envy every time she casually orders dim sum for us, changes to Mandarin when she sees a friend and casually changes back to English with my sister and I. It's definitely nice to stay in touch with your roots, so if you're young and reading this realize that it only gets harder to learn when you're older :) and that it's worth it and a admirable skill to have in the future. So don't be stupid like me! And learn :) learn all you can!

:x Destruction

Lets see what else...I got a huge yesstyle package the other day ^^ When I saw the box I thought "oh geez". I heard a lot of stuff going around Valentine's Day gets tossed around pretty badly...happily enough all was perfectly well inside thanks to the Yesstyle elves amazing packing skills and affinity towards bubble wrap :D

Success! Lol

Not even a single box was bent o_O Amazing. But probably not very eco friendly LOL.

Lastly... finals are coming up, JOY! Not. But then after that I get to go to my favorite place ^^ New York! Ahhh east coast how I've missed you. Not your horrible weather or many potholes that leave my butt black and bruised the next day, but everything else is pretty much a win in my opinion :) :) I haven't seen my boyfriend in over 8 weeks now :/ I think once it hits 6 weeks of not seeing him that's the hardest. I didn't get to see him for Valentine's Day or his birthday (he's 24 now ^^) because If you miss even ONE day of chinese it lowers your grade..miss two days and its a full letter grade lower! -_- As you can see my chinese class has taken over my life and it wouldn't be worth it to go for only 36 hours AND lower my grade. Also if I had went I wouldn't be able to afford to go for the much longer winter break :[ So alas...story of our lives D: But at least I get to see him soon :)

Oh and a quick question to you all, thank you for the many compliments on this eye look ^^ I'm actually really liking these lenses too, but could any of you recommend to me a prescription lens that is this color from a brand like acuvue etc? A lot of people recommended freshlooks but I was wondering if you guys knew of any others? I've always wanted grey contacts but don't like how many of them look :[:[:[ But I also don't want to keep wearing these circle lens as I find them to be incredibly uncomfortable and I do question their safety.

Anyways off to sleep, night folks :D

love, Jackie

Thursday, March 03, 2011

Really quick swatches- Will spruce this up tomo!

Canmake Cheek and Highlight $15

Canmake Cream Cheek (#5 left coral and #8 right pink)

Canmake Bright Up Color

The swatches all together

[click to enlarge]

Top streak: Canmake Bright Up Color #03 ivory pink $20.00
Bottom left two: Canmake Cheek & Highlight $15.00
2nd to right: Canmake Cream Cheek blush in #08 $15.00
Far right: Canmake Cream Cheek blush in #05 $15.00